In a growing world of information and technology ,its fair game to want to be updated with the latest news, trends and pretty much anything that’s new and exciting to one’s fancy or not.
The need to get involved, to see, experience new things, gain new skills, meet new people, see new places, read that one book, Listen to that album and yet sometimes within this vast world of options and experiences, one may feel like they are missing out. Being the one in control of what moves you and what you are obligated to may intensify this reality. One of life’s melancholy and yet truest moments.
This phenomena has been dubbed, FOMO – Fear of missing out. FOMO is a mix of envy and insecurity which can lead to anxiety and in most cases indecision.
The more FOMO consumes you the more you are paralysed with not making any moves(FOMO is the brother of the “paradox of choice”),the pain that one feels from having the thought that others are doing something we ourselves desire may make us feel unhappy and unfulfilled with our current situation. There are two ways of looking at FOMO that is through a romantic or classical view.
The Romantic feels pain that someone out there is living a life that they desperately want. The constant thought of “if only” I had that job, I had that car. They believe in a divine, defined centre. Life is in two parts the mediocre and the elect, they want to be the elect.
The classic minded do admit that there are indeed wonderful things going on in the world but, the obvious signs of glamour to them isn’t a good guide to finding these wonderful things. They view that good may exist in the ordinary, everything is in mix.
Fame and fortune may not be a true indication of true intelligence, famous people may be dull and unattractive people can be interesting or remarkable. You can have all you ever wanted by really still be unhappy. They do fear missing out but, view it in that, one can miss out if they are so quick to find happiness away from self, elsewhere.
Whether you feel like you are none, both or one of either, one thing that does matters like a disease – a cure. How should we view FOMO when it does hits us in those moments in your life?
1. Be willing to not have it all, Accept things will happen without you
You are not a superman or wonder woman. Yes, FOMO can indeed be misleading. Desires and wants can blind us to real life. Accepting the futility of or stop trying to fulfilling every desire is impossible.
Having the wisdom to control and know when to indulge in – be it in one’s impulses and gratifications is the only super power you have. You may not do everything but, make the best out of what you have.
2. Practice mindfulness by slowing down
Being mindful like my mantra is being present. Taking it slow(I admit, am working on it too) from what I have learnt is slowing down does not mean taking your time or being slow, it means just being at speed with the present, not too fast not too slow.
The world is a big place, things are going on every second rather than chasing after what maybe an illusion of happiness, make the best with what you have, giving no hard judgment or negative thought to either you or what others are doing or that you maybe or maybe not missing out on. Take it easy.
3. Prioritise what really matters
Prioritising is one lesson everyone needs. Quality relationships are better than quality possessions. Envy can become resentment if we fail to recognise what we have now and the opportunities that you have to make something of your life.
Prioritising gives clearer attention to those things that have heart and meaning. Rather than fame, symbol, possessions, focus on a feeling of accomplishment, adventure, self-respect, freedom and fun with people you care about and a life that truly matters.
4. One day at a time by cultivating an attitude of gratitude.
There is always something to be grateful about. Life can be a shit storm. We don’t get what we want, but we do have times of joy, peace, strength and virtue. Enjoy the process of life, life is story, embrace it and live brave.
Pleasure and great FOMO fulfilling experience may be wonderful but, being too occupied with FOMO diminishes our ability to experience the deeper fulfilment that comes from nourishing one’s mind and body.
“Be present-it is the only moment that matters”